GRIDLOCKED
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IT has taken me ages to get through my last book – partly because I’ve been busy enjoying the sunshine and partly because it was quite disappointing.
I really like Ben Elton, he’s funny and has the ability to capture the darker side of modern life and weave it into intriguing stories.
I really enjoyed “Past Mortem”, which is a take on Friends Reunited with the addition of a serial killer, “Dead Famous”, a sinister take on Big Brother and the explosion of reality TV, and “Chart Throb”, a satirical look at the talent shows such as “Pop Idol” and “X-Factor”.
His books are usually real page-turners – each chapter ending with a couple of drips of suspense to keep you glued to your seat.
I first got into Ben Elton when I was bored on holiday in Crete quite a few years ago. The boyfriend that I was with at the time was a voracious reader and insisted that I start my Elton-cation with “Blast From The Past”. I absolutely loved it and am still a little mystified as to how he came up with – and wrote – such a brilliant novel. (Am not going to give anything away so that I’m not accused of ruining it for anyone).
So, I went book shopping for my latest holiday, which does actually feel like it was enjoyed by someone else, and I spotted “Gridlock” for a tempting 99p. With his track record totally unblemished, I purchased it without a thought.
But, my goodness, it was hard-going. The concept was great – the idea that London could grind to a halt because of all of the cars. With a controversial road-building plan and a top secret plans for a hydrogen engine thrown in the mix, it could and should have been an excellent yarn.
It has taken me all of my energy to get to the end and I have to say I was greatly disappointed. It is now on the pile to go to the charity shop while my bedside table strains under the weight of all of the books I’ve bought recently. Better make a start and hope that I have selected better ones this time! |
Published Date:
19/06/2007
Modified Date:
19/06/2007
The Neverending Story
WHEN my siser was younger she was a bit of an obsessive, especially when it came to films like the Goonies, Mary Poppins and Wizard of Oz. She would rise at 5 a.m. and watch them before she went to school.
But without doubt her favourite was the Neverending Story - a circular film that gave a very specific lesson about imagination and, more importantly, books. Yeah, it was cheesy and the hero of the hour was a big flying dog/dragon thing, but it made her cry every time. I really must ask her if at the ripe old age of 26, it still gets to her.
But enough of this rather self-indulgent trip down memory lane! We got to talking in the office this week about books that we hadn't been able to finish - our own Neverending stories. Whereas one of my colleagues, who shall remain nameless, claimed that he had never read a whole book in his life (shame on you), the rest racked their brains. And funnily enough, most of the unfinishable ones were so-called classics.
"The Catcher in the Rye", "The Handmaid's Tale", "Lord of the Rings", "Crime and Punishment", "Sophie's Choice" - the list went on and on.
But when it came to mind, I could only think of one that I have returned to four time and still haven't managed to finish. Rather surprisingly for me it is Nick Hornby's "A Long Way Down". It was billed as funny. It is not. It was supposed to be dark. It was more dark age. It is about people wanting to end their lives. It made me feel really quite depressed. I only got halfway through and found it absolutely rubbish. The characters were one-dimensional - if that - and the idea that more than one person would choose the same place and time to top themselves should have made the publishers run in the other direction.
So it has been resigned to the bookshelf in the sky, may it rest there forever and bore no other eager reader.
There is only one aspect of this that saddens me - Nick Hornby penned one of my favourite books, "About A Boy".
Published Date:
11/05/2007
Modified Date:
11/05/2007
The Hairy Bikers and me
I'M not usually a fan of hairy men or motorbikes - but I loooovve the Hairy Bikers.
This is a recent obsession, which was firmly cemented on Monday.
I stumbled across them on Saturday Kitchen and instantly liked their kamikaze cooking expeditions. They travel across countries on motorbikes, seek out traditional dishes, sample customs - including beer - and Si invariably ends up injured or in hospital. They have a big fat belly laugh at their experiences - and so do I. |
So when I was accosted by an assistant in my favourite bookshop, I snatched his hand off for a ticket to watch two of my favourite men on TV (and can I just say that there is quite a long list!).
Now I don't usually get star-struck, but when they walked in I was all of a dither - and so was my friend Kate.
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But within a minute or so, it was like this disarming pair were in my living room having a chat about old times. Si and Dave - we are on first name terms now - gave humorous accounts of their travels in India, Morocco, Belgium and Argentina and had the audience in peels of laughter. They showed off their tattoos, did a couple of hilarious re-enactments and shamelessly plugged their book.
I was totally enthralled and they are now sitting proudly at the top of my list of favourite personalities. I even greeted each of them with a kiss (which, for those who don't know me, is not something I really do unless I REALLY REALLY REALLY like someone).
I'm now looking forward to reading their book!!
PS Apologies for the lack of updates in the past two weeks, but my mum turned 60 and I was chief party planner. She is now delighting in all of the "freebies" such as eye tests (which she had last week), bus passes etc.. Books, as she says, have always been free from the library or my ever-growing collection.
PPS Kate is returning my hostaged books two by two - I'd be more worried if she borrowed my dog Marley. Would she return him hair by hair?
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Published Date:
26/04/2007
Modified Date:
26/04/2007
Spiritual Journey...The First Step
With no word from J.K., I'm having to fill my time with a different quest - it's just that I'm not quite sure which direction I'm taking yet.
Recent events in my life have reminded me about the fragility of life and the impression that we, as individuals, leave on this world.
I'm not sure whether I'm embarking on a spiritual or emotional journey, but I'm keen to enrich my existence.
Working full-time breeds the sense that we've earned our free time and, as such, indulge ourselves in rather a base fashion. It is very easy to become egocentric and shove more worthy acitivities on the back-burner for another day.
But (pardon the puns) I've turned over a new leaf, I've started a new chapter.
I have lived a charmed life in a lot of respects. Although I relish showing my mum up for hitting me round the face with a spoon once - very much deserved, I have to say - my childhood was idyllic compared to others.
Perhaps the most powerful example of this is Dave Pelzer's "A Child Called It". His childhood was a waking nightmare as his alcoholic and emotionally unstable mother - to put it mildly - subjected him to daily abuse. She humiliated him, beat him, scalded him and starved him, all the while treating her other sons like princes. It is a truly harrowing read, but an essential one that reminds us how fortunate we are.
Dave Pelzer has gone on to write about his escape and survival and has become a renowned motivational and life speaker in America. He is an inspiring man and his story I hold dear to my heart, especially because, even with everything that he has been through, he is a caring, giving man who has forgiven his mother.
I think there is a lesson there for us all!
Published Date:
18/04/2007
Modified Date:
18/04/2007
JK Rowling and the Deathly Red Pen
Now I have to admit that agreeing to write this blog was not entirely selfless.
Much as I wanted to support our new venture, I had an entirely different scenario playing out in my mind.
Obviously, in my world - the one that is not exactly rooted in reality - J.K. Rowling is an avid reader of the Burnley Express. And with the advent of burnleyexpress.net, the Harry Potter creator would soon find my blog and realise my love of all things book.
J.K. - or Jo as I would call her - would send an urgent e-mail explaining that her favourite proof-reader had had the life sucked out of her by a Dementor and second on the list, a woman who refused to bow to Buckbeak, had suffered a fatal peck by the angry hippogriff. Being the next loyal subject worthy of the job, she beseeches me to step in and look at "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows". After deliberating for at least half a time-turned second, I am there with a flourish of my trusty red pen.
The manuscript arrives via the speedy night bus and I burn the midnight oil (that's not a spell, by the way) over the 7,000 pages. By the time I've finished with it, the book is a trim 763 pages and I've also used a touch of artistic licence and killed off Harry Potter (I have a £10 bounty on that young wizard's head).
Once the book is launched into mass production, I am good to all HP fans and choose not to spoil it. Although I do cash in by leaking little lies about the plot to various national newspapers.
At midnight on July 21st, I join the queue outside a well-known bookseller and purchase the book before texting anyone with a dark mark (against their name in my little black book) and giving away the ending.
But as I tumble back to reality, I have to wait for the tantalising book, just like everyone else.
I shall be venturing out in the wee hours to pick up my copy, but I'll have to quell the urge to tell some pretentious little HP know-it-all that his hero is dead. Unless, of course, I hiss it in parceltongue...
Published Date:
18/04/2007
Modified Date:
18/04/2007
VICTORIA'S LENDING LIBRARY
My guest room - which doubles as a decadent reading room even though I tend to read in coffee shops, at my desk, in bed, anywhere but - was somewhat empty when I went in the other night.
I was thinking about this blog and trying to work out where to start. For so long, my reading tastes have been diverse that I can't pinpoint a favourite book
I came close late last year with three amazing books - "A Million Little Pieces", "My Friend Leonard" and "Marley and Me" - but I'm still not convinced. What makes the perfect book? Is it supposed to make you laugh then cry then laugh again? Make you read at the speed of light, hungry to find out what happens? Or leave you feeling like you've lost the love of your life when you reach the end of the final page?
All three of these had a profound impact on me, but when I went to reaquaint myself with them - the bookshelf was bare.
I only have myself to blame though. I am so passionate about books, especially extraordinary ones, that I feel compelled to share them with other people. Once I've read them, they rarely rest on my bookcase and are usually in the hands of my friends and family.
It is a bit of a standing joke that I buy books just to fill out my "lending library", a branch of which is at my friend Kate's house. She is the most regular recipient of my books, but is not too good at returning them. I could make a lot of cash if I introduced fines! Beware Kate!
Published Date:
17/04/2007
Modified Date:
17/04/2007
I'M HOOKED
I AM hooked on books! Whereas other people may have a weakness for a bottle of wine or a box of indulgent chocolates, my downfall is books.
For me, they are a treasured luxury. I get a natural high when I buy one, it’s an adrenalin rush into an anticipated adventure. It’s like I’m about to step onto a rollercoaster in the safety of someone else’s shoes, hearing the screams through their ears, seeing the sights through their eyes and not having to admit to being really scared myself.
Wherever I go, I carry a book. It represents pages and pages of escapism and, being a news reporter, that is sometimes just what I need - to be able to take a peek into someone else’s world without being intrusive. When the clouds in my skies are grey, I find that they can be black in other people’s world or sky-blue-pink with yellow dots in others. Stories often make me forget the darkness and chase the rainbow all the way to its pot of uplifting sunshine.
Now I’m not saying that I only read “happy” books - that couldn’t be further from the truth - but it is rare that a book doesn’t alter my mood for the better. Sometimes I realise how fortunate I am and other times I’m whisked into a whimsical world where real life problems just melt away.
Over the coming weeks, I promise a whistlestop tour of some classic books (and some not so classic books) that have made me smile and, in some very, very rare cases, cry.
But this isn’t all about me. I’d like to know about what you like to read. What is your favourite book? Can you recommend a book that I should read? Do you agree with my take on books? Do you want me to suggest a book for you to read?
Published Date:
17/04/2007
Modified Date:
17/04/2007